I've decided that taking a shower is both the best and WORST part of my day, sometimes more than once a day! *Can't help it, the power of the great showerhead is one hell of a motivator*!!! But I digress!!
The shower seems to be my place for thinking! I have no idea why this is, but there you have it.
So while I was in the shower tonight I was thinking about this blog.
It is my sincerest Desire that this blog will somehow, some way make money one day. Of course, this means I'm breaking all the rules because I'm not writing for an online how to site, which means this blog is my thoughts all the time!
Secondly, I DO NOT insert spaces between paragraphs, or more accurately, I DO, but when I cut and paste my blog from my email into my blog, the editing function DOES NOT! *PAIN IN THE ASS*!
Nevertheless, that is my Desire.
This lead directly into my next thought which was on bullies, bullying, etc.
I've been hearing Shinedown's new song "Bully!" for 2--3 weeks now! Great song by the way! And for at least a year there's been talk of bullies online and offline. I must confess, my immediate and visceral reaction was:
"Where the fuck was all this 'we're against bullies!' talk when I was standing at the bathroom sink at chesaning middle school in chesaning michigan scrubbing the spitwad some bastard had just hocked at me 14 years ago off my face!???? Where was the 'It Gets Better' campaign then???
I'm thrilled to know outreach groups exist! DO NOT mistake my words! I. AM. ECSTATIC!!! However, if I said I was only thrilled and not enraged!!! I'd be lying.
My second reaction was the thrilling one.
This thought lead into a third.
How deep am I willing to go on this blog? I'm working on my autobiography "The Messenger Unveiled" and I go DEEP there. And honestly, I go deep here to. Just take a look at my Swamprot post! So I go deep! But was I willing to go deep on a blog celebrities WILL read?
I say WILL read, because I've made a vow to myself to act as if! Another way of saying: 'Fake it till I make it.'
So did I Desire their managers to read this? Their representatives, them??? How about someone from Congress? Or the President himself?
Considering the discrimination I've faced and witnessed others face I seriously had to think about it.
Of course, two seconds later I thought: "To hell with it! Singers do it all the time!" Eminem most notably, but others to! If I'm going to get backlash I might as well start and end that way! No point hiding it until I myself am in the spotlight doing public speaking and the like.
I was drying off when I thought: "Yeah, I'm ready. . . bring it on!!"
And that was just in the shower! You wouldn't believe the things that crop up when I'm listening to music!
---
I generally have a difficult time posting thank you comments to my readers, but I deeply appreciate all of you!
If you feel so inclined, please share me with others!
With Love,
Chelle
Showing posts with label music. Show all posts
Showing posts with label music. Show all posts
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
Monday, January 2, 2012
New Year's Day Desire!
I've been playing with the idea of writing out my new year since before November hit, but I didn't get around to it.
You know, waiting for the 'right time', thinking about HOW I was going to write it, something that really needs no consideration since it's MY diary and noone else's! Finally, I rarely keep up with this blog as it is, so there's no guarantee of anything!!
On that note though, I think I have something worked out for me to write out my New Year.
Sunday January 1st 2012
Today I'm recovering from a pretty kick-ass New Year's Eve spent with my BFF Holly!
We spent Saturday night listening to a throw back playlist she helped me create!
Tunes were varied but included:
1. NIRVANA, "SMELLS LIKE TEEN SPIRIT, POLLY, BREED, SOMETHING IN THE WAY and RAPE ME"!
2. NIN, "CLOSER"!!
3. AIC, "ANGRY CHAIR, WOULD, and ROOSTER"!
4. RATM, "Killing In The Name Of"!
5. PJ, "BLACK, BETTERMAN, and INDIFFERENCE"!
6. P.O.D, "Youth Of The Nation!
7. Smashing Pumpkins, "Bullet With Butterfly Wings, Ever Lasting Gaze and Ava Adore"!
8. Korn, "Freak On A Leash, Adidas, Make Me Bad, and Alone I Break"!
9. Marcy Playground, "Sex And Candy"!
10. The Vervepipe, "Freshmen"!
11. Linkin Park, "Crawling, In The End, Breaking The Habit!
12. Susanne Vega, "Tom's Diner"!
13. Eminem, "My Name Is"!!
14. The Spice Girls, "Say You'll Be There, Love Thang,"!!
15. Duncan Sheik, "I Am Bearly Breathing"!!
16. The Afghan Wigs, "Gentleman"!
17. Foo Fighters, "Everlong, It's You I Fell Into"!!
18. Our Lady Peace, "One Man Army, Superman"!!
19. "Fuel, "A Million Miles, Sunburn"!!
20. Live, "I Alone, Freaks"!!
21. Tupac, "I Get Around, California Love"!!
22. Biggie, "Hypnotize, Mo Money Mo Problems"
23. Snoop Dog, "Gin and Juice,"!!
24. Warren G, "Regulator"!!
25. Tool, 46 and 2, Anema, Sober and Parabol/Parabola"!!
26. APC, "Judith, Orestes, Weak and Powerless"!!
27. SOAD, "Spiders, Sugar"!
28. Disturbed, "Down With The Sickness, Shout 2000"!!
29. STP, "Interstate Love Song, Big Empty"!!
And of course, I could go on forever, so we'll just leave it at various and sundry other throwbacks to the 90's/early 2000's!!
Point is we sat around talking, making plans for the New Year and just enjoying the 'back in the day' feeling of it all!!
I must confess to feeling stunningly optomistic and I don't think it gets any better then this!!
I love being around her because she helps me get the wheels turning in my head when I seem to struggle. She helps me clean out the bullshit and get down to the nitty gritty. She doesn't necessarily focus on the 'how', she encourages me to dream and she throws out suggestions when she thinks I need them. Sometimes we disagree, I think I need them and she doesn't, but that's neither here nor there!!! Lol.
I explained to her a few weeks ago that 2012 was my year! This was it, I was finally sure it was, so I was going to throw my back into it and if by January 14th 2013 I hadn't made any progress towards my goals, huge and wide ranging as they are I was going to kill myself.
To most this may seem counter-productive, but for me it has laid the foundation for something new to occur. Reason being that I don't feel trapped anymore, don't feel like this is going to be never ending. It has an ending and because I see that it won't go on forever I feel like it leaves me open to growth, movement and change.
So we talked about said growth, movement and change last night.
I say recovering because we were up rather late and covered what I felt like was ALOT of ground. It's amazing how talking with someone helps you straighten out all the wild thoughts running around in your head!
I admit it, I ordered Hungry Howie's pepperoni sub for dinner, the one Dad swears is a heartattack waiting to happen! Lol. But other than that I was fabulous!!
We played cards and marbles, even broke out a few games we hardly ever play and when midnight came we blew whistles and set off a few fireworks!! It was totally awesome! It felt like a throwback to MTV days when MTV actually stood for something!!!
It is my Desire to stand for something. . . Funny how talking about MTV brought that thought to the forefront for me.
My intention was to post this closer to the day it was written, December 20th. It's here now though and that's all that matters!!
I will tell you all, I stayed at home and watched History 2's Armageddon Week instead. I set off lots of fireworks at 12 after calling to wish Friendis a Happy New Year and that was that.
If you appreciate my story and feel moved to do so, I am requesting donations of money to make plans like this and future plans of this nature come true for myself!!!
Thank you and happy reading!
Chelle
You know, waiting for the 'right time', thinking about HOW I was going to write it, something that really needs no consideration since it's MY diary and noone else's! Finally, I rarely keep up with this blog as it is, so there's no guarantee of anything!!
On that note though, I think I have something worked out for me to write out my New Year.
Sunday January 1st 2012
Today I'm recovering from a pretty kick-ass New Year's Eve spent with my BFF Holly!
We spent Saturday night listening to a throw back playlist she helped me create!
Tunes were varied but included:
1. NIRVANA, "SMELLS LIKE TEEN SPIRIT, POLLY, BREED, SOMETHING IN THE WAY and RAPE ME"!
2. NIN, "CLOSER"!!
3. AIC, "ANGRY CHAIR, WOULD, and ROOSTER"!
4. RATM, "Killing In The Name Of"!
5. PJ, "BLACK, BETTERMAN, and INDIFFERENCE"!
6. P.O.D, "Youth Of The Nation!
7. Smashing Pumpkins, "Bullet With Butterfly Wings, Ever Lasting Gaze and Ava Adore"!
8. Korn, "Freak On A Leash, Adidas, Make Me Bad, and Alone I Break"!
9. Marcy Playground, "Sex And Candy"!
10. The Vervepipe, "Freshmen"!
11. Linkin Park, "Crawling, In The End, Breaking The Habit!
12. Susanne Vega, "Tom's Diner"!
13. Eminem, "My Name Is"!!
14. The Spice Girls, "Say You'll Be There, Love Thang,"!!
15. Duncan Sheik, "I Am Bearly Breathing"!!
16. The Afghan Wigs, "Gentleman"!
17. Foo Fighters, "Everlong, It's You I Fell Into"!!
18. Our Lady Peace, "One Man Army, Superman"!!
19. "Fuel, "A Million Miles, Sunburn"!!
20. Live, "I Alone, Freaks"!!
21. Tupac, "I Get Around, California Love"!!
22. Biggie, "Hypnotize, Mo Money Mo Problems"
23. Snoop Dog, "Gin and Juice,"!!
24. Warren G, "Regulator"!!
25. Tool, 46 and 2, Anema, Sober and Parabol/Parabola"!!
26. APC, "Judith, Orestes, Weak and Powerless"!!
27. SOAD, "Spiders, Sugar"!
28. Disturbed, "Down With The Sickness, Shout 2000"!!
29. STP, "Interstate Love Song, Big Empty"!!
And of course, I could go on forever, so we'll just leave it at various and sundry other throwbacks to the 90's/early 2000's!!
Point is we sat around talking, making plans for the New Year and just enjoying the 'back in the day' feeling of it all!!
I must confess to feeling stunningly optomistic and I don't think it gets any better then this!!
I love being around her because she helps me get the wheels turning in my head when I seem to struggle. She helps me clean out the bullshit and get down to the nitty gritty. She doesn't necessarily focus on the 'how', she encourages me to dream and she throws out suggestions when she thinks I need them. Sometimes we disagree, I think I need them and she doesn't, but that's neither here nor there!!! Lol.
I explained to her a few weeks ago that 2012 was my year! This was it, I was finally sure it was, so I was going to throw my back into it and if by January 14th 2013 I hadn't made any progress towards my goals, huge and wide ranging as they are I was going to kill myself.
To most this may seem counter-productive, but for me it has laid the foundation for something new to occur. Reason being that I don't feel trapped anymore, don't feel like this is going to be never ending. It has an ending and because I see that it won't go on forever I feel like it leaves me open to growth, movement and change.
So we talked about said growth, movement and change last night.
I say recovering because we were up rather late and covered what I felt like was ALOT of ground. It's amazing how talking with someone helps you straighten out all the wild thoughts running around in your head!
I admit it, I ordered Hungry Howie's pepperoni sub for dinner, the one Dad swears is a heartattack waiting to happen! Lol. But other than that I was fabulous!!
We played cards and marbles, even broke out a few games we hardly ever play and when midnight came we blew whistles and set off a few fireworks!! It was totally awesome! It felt like a throwback to MTV days when MTV actually stood for something!!!
It is my Desire to stand for something. . . Funny how talking about MTV brought that thought to the forefront for me.
My intention was to post this closer to the day it was written, December 20th. It's here now though and that's all that matters!!
I will tell you all, I stayed at home and watched History 2's Armageddon Week instead. I set off lots of fireworks at 12 after calling to wish Friendis a Happy New Year and that was that.
If you appreciate my story and feel moved to do so, I am requesting donations of money to make plans like this and future plans of this nature come true for myself!!!
Thank you and happy reading!
Chelle
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