Friday, May 18, 2012

Evening Pages and Brags!!!!

I Brag I went outside today and sat out there by myself for a while!!!
This is a huuuuuuge Brag for me because I've had a fear of bugs that fly/buzz ever since I was a little girl. There was also the fear of getting lost and not being able to make my way back to the house which has actually happened in the past.
Trying to keep it short since bed is calling, but I rode my tricycle into the middle of Gary road and almost got ran over by a truck and I went out to visit my Rabbit Fluffy once during the winter, got lost in the snow and ended up falling in a ditch.
I Brag I did my workout today!!
Got up to 800 with my Affirmation: "I am the essence of love!" and up to 400 with my combo Affirmation: "I am ready to face my fears of abandonment and lonleness!!"
I was working on the Love one but in the middle of it fear kept popping up so I decided to go with it.
I Brag I've been learning to go with the flow lately and that includes with my Affirmations!
I Brag I'm beginning to create my own rules!!
Onto the rest of the day, there was a shabby part this evening after Dad came home and didn't invite me out to eat with him even after I asked him about food and told him I'd be ready whenever dinner was done. I chose to decide that he just wanted to eat alone since he let the girls eat outside. *he usually doesn't do that*.
I admit I was hurt and thought he was being a prick or at the minimum a jerk, but after stewing for a bit I chose to let it pass and my evening picked up!
I got to watch a clip of ELI singing one of the songs for NONPOINT'S upcoming album!! I'm soooo psyched!!!!!! And then to talk with my coach Kimberly on how to figure out what my Major in College will be.
So between her giving me an answer on how to figure it out, watching ELI and choosing to let it go my evening ended on a high note!!
I did my second round of Tapping on school, College in particular. I'm sooo proud of myself for keeping up!! Woohoo!!! Man I rock!!!
And now I'm here writing this!
I put those Science News mags in a bag so they aren't cluttering up my bed anymore!
And I caught the #1 song of the 90's from VH1'S countdown this evening! Bet you'll never guess what it was!!
Paaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrttttttttyyyyyyyy!!!! I was soooooo thrilled about that!! Everybody knows KURT is NUMERO UNO!!!!
I backed over my sister's Dog Duke's paw with my computer chair. . . felt like such a heel for doing that! I didn't do it on purpose but I still felt horrible! That's one of the downsides of not seeing!!
Random thought, but I know myself well enough to know I have to say I did it. Even though it was an accident the only way for me not to run it over and over in my mind is to just say it happened. I loved him up afterward and he gave me his belly so I know he forgave me. Sis just said: "You won't lay behind her chair again will ya?"
Oh, and speaking of sis, she got me sunscreen today! I gave her the money, but she stopped at the dollar store and picked it up for me.
So that enabled me to go sit outside and not worry about getting burned up! And I almost forgot, a flying bug decided to stop by for a visit!!!! ARGH!!! I didn't scream or run though. I didn't even jump much. I just covered my ears and waited for it to go away! I'm getting better!! I'm getting better!!
Peace, Love Empathy. . .

What if the one thing that I missed,
Was everything I need to pass the test,
And if I fail what happens then,
Can I still count on you as a friend
"Live to Rise"--Christopher Cornell/Soundgarden, from The Avengers Soundtrack

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