Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Breakthrough incoming!!!

Original Posting: Date: Wed, 8 Jun 2011 22:44:03 -0400

I'm on Module III, Chapter 12 in Lissa's "Get Out Of Your Own Way"
E-course, and it's about recognizing your self-worth and harnessing
your feminine power.
This wasn't a Secret Sauce Writing Exercise *that's what the official
exercises that you HAVE to do are called*, and their at the end of
each section. Yes, it goes modules, chapters and sections within
chapters! Lol. Anyway, She has written 10 ways to increase your
feelings of self-worth, and one of the suggestions is to write down 10
things that your better at than anyone else. I got 10 things, though
I'm getting over the fact that I feel conceded and boastful rather
than anything.
1. I can tell my story better than anyone else can.
2. I know myself better than anyone else does.
3. I paint better than anyone else does.
4. I bake better than anyone else does.
5. I care for babies better than anyone else does.
6. I sing better than anyone else who hasn't been trained does.
7. I connect with people better than anyone else does.
8. I pleasure myself better than anyone else can!
9. I take better care of my family than anyone else can.
10. I am more loyal to humanity than anyone else is.
The next thing was to write down 10 things that you believe detracts
from your self worth, and here's where the breakthrough came in! She
says you can write out your whole sob story, using hundreds of pages,
if you feel you need to. We all already know mine, so I didn't feel
the need to, but here's the kicker! I only came up with 6 things, and
most of those I had to travel back for, to before the past couple
So here's the list.
1. My disability.
2. My birth defect. *These two pretty much go hand in hand, and I
think the more I talk about them the better I'll feel. I also think
getting myself around people who don't care will help. What I mean is
just a few weeks ago we went to Old Navy and it was Dad, the
stepsisters, becca and I. These people started following us and
staring *which I didn't know*, until becca got pissed off and said:
"Why don't you fuckin' motherfuckers take a fucking picture!" Until
then I had no idea what was going on. That does have a tendency to get
under my skin, whereas if I'm with someone else who chooses to ignore
it, I don't notice either because I can't see the person(s). So unless
their right up on me or start asking me questions I have no clue.*.
3. My weight. *Been walking around buck naked in my room all day long
with it being in the 90's and 4-5 days a week telling myself just how
fine I am when I'm in the bath. I think it's a safe bet to say it's
4. My negativity. *An old one that I rarely buy into anymore. I can be
quite positive when I decide to be! Guess who accused me of that????
My mother of course! Lol*.
5. My nasty thoughts about others and myself. *Another old one that I
now put down to being human! Whoa, I just admitted I was human! Lol.
Anyway, we all have nasty thoughts about others and ourselves from
time to time and I don't see anyone wire tapping my brain, so until
they do, I'm not going to bother being concerned with it anymore*.
6. My rage. *Learning to channel this one, so it's not a bad thing*!
Just wanted to share!

Bring your love baby I could bring my shame
Bring the drugs baby I could bring my pain
I got my heart right here
I got my scars right here
Bring the cups baby I could bring the drank
Bring your body baby I could bring you fame
And that's my motherfucking word too
Just let me motherfucking love you
House of Balloons - "Wicked Game" Copyright 2011

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